Thursday, January 21, 2010

Season 1 Episode 10

Ramaswami feels a strange tingling throughout his body at this moment.
"Oh my Gawd! What a time for yindigestion I say." The powerful bun he has eaten earlier has started to work, perhaps sped on by the bee sting.He feels strange powers coursing through his body.
"Wait a minute. Can it be that the bun has worked and not given me yindigestion, or food paisining, but mystic Swami powers instead?"

The house around him rocks and air currents are set up around our hero.

"The time is now, I say", he yells and his lungi changes colour.
The mundu cheta leader yells to make himself heard above the rumble of the yak rushing in and the chaos caused by Ramaswami's new found powers "Ramaswami, I say, You now have a technicolour lungi!! Very bling man."
Ramaswami lets the yak hit him head on, right at his crotch. The lungi protects him. The yak suffers a concussion of colossal limits and is rushed away to NIMHANS in an ambulance.
(In an alternate reality where the RSPCA does not exist, the Mundu Cheta leader cuts up the yak and Ramaswami's party is soon served with enough non-veg food,namely yak meat, for a hundred people.)
"I feel good." sings out Ramaswami in a tune vaguely resembling 'Mary had a Little Lamb'. Just at that moment Jovin comes in on Ramaswami's katar-katar Bajaj scooter. He nods at Ramaswami and whispers something to the Mundu Chetha leader.
"Ramaswami, my friend, I am afraid the frog got away. But with your new powers he will not dare mess with you again".
"You are right", yells Ramaswami in what he thinks to be his manly-hero voice, "He dare not mess with me and my technicolour lungi."

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Season 1, Episode 9

As Mr. Frog and Jovin speed away in their bikes, Ramaswami sits on a cane chair dejected, "What have I done??" And the leader of Mundu Cheta Boys responds, "You don't know what you've done?! I'll tell you. You did a boo-boo and gave RBA to the lady in red with the suuuper sexy hawt voice and then thought that a bun spoke to you! Maaaad fellow I say."
"Sorry da. I don't know what happened to me... The lady in red was suuuper hawt da."
"Okay now. Not to worry. Redeem yourself Ramaswami."
Ramaswami rises from his chair slowly. A rush of wind, his lungi flutters, his silk chaddi shines. It's time. The hero has risen from his fallen state and now, it's time.

Time for change.
Time for action.
Time for...

Suddenly Ramaswami turns his head to his right and pukes into the dustbin.
"Go get our hero some water please. He's a leeetal slow today," says the leader.

After Ramaswami has had his fill, he clears his throat and declares, "I'm bee-yak!"

As he says that, a bee enters the room from a window far behind him and stings him on his lower lip. And a yak bursts through the front door.

Monday, January 18, 2010

Season 1 Episode 8

While Ramaswami is pondering over how to get through this dilemma the Mundu Cheta Boys gatecrash the party. The leader, a short,hairy, presumably human person shouts, "Vats this Ramaswami? We did not get our invitashawn (invitation)? I have just got back from the Gelf and want to show everybody my bling bling mund!"
"Machaa! Im very sorry. But we cannot pardy now as you fellows say. We are all dying!" replies Ramaswami.
"Dying? Ah! Food poisoning aa? So that is why Kukuswami is rolling on the floor beating his stomach with a cricket bat."
"Eggzactly!"
The leader thinks for a minute, chewing on his lower lip, lost in though. He suddenly smiles and snaps his fingers.
"I got it. Kappam Meen Curry will fix your problem but they will only think of Kappam Meen Curry for the next three days. Roychan! Where are you? Cook some Kappam Meen Curry! Ramaswami! You should be thanking me! I have saved you."
Ramaswami clutches his stomach, groans and faints, falling right onto a conveniently placed bun.
"I say Ramaswami, that bun has saved you from brain damage. And now, we shall save your stomach."
They force feed an unconscious Ramaswami with Kappam Meen Curry and then do the same to the rest. They all regain consciousness and complain about the arrack!
"It is not the arrack you yeediat buggers! It was the frog! The Venatricroakatist!"
The Mundu Cheta leader snaps his fingers and when this doesn't work whistles to get everybody's attention. "If it is a frog problem then Jovin can help you! He has just come back from France where he was the number one frog catcher and frog eater! He has done an amazing amazing job in my garden! If you also have cockroach problem, you can tell Kunyu. Number one cockroach catcher in China!"
Jovin nods at Ramaswami and goes off in search of the forg. All of a sudden they hear Ramaswami's katar katar Bajaj scooter start up and they all rush to the window. The frog is remarkable in more than just its vocal abilities! It can ride bikes! The frog puts the bike in gear, does a wheel spin and zooms away, followed by Jovin on his Yamaha Rx, fork and knife in his back jeans pocket, and napkin tied around his neck.
"Curses! I would have succeeded if it wasn't for you meddling mallus!" cries the frog as it rides away.